Goodbye 2012, Hello 2013.

Salam,

And we have left 2012....all of the struggles & victories of the year is now just bittersweet memories...its scary that every day that passes just brings us closer to death.

I think I should start thinking that waiting for love as much as I am waiting for death. All of it is in the hands of God. Why should I think that I might find love before I meet death? But I do want to die being married then being single. Whatever it is I just have to pray for the best. InsyaAllah...amin

2012 has been a challenge, a challenge different from 2011. 2011 was a year of pain. A year where I thought I found something new, but I was disappointed. Through that I learn to not hope. From there I learn to bring myself up for 2012, I think I learn to be stronger. Learn to rely more on myself. But I know nothing is impossible without HIS will. I am challenged with a job that requires me to perform & show results. I am challenged to be back in school to secure myself a degree. I am challenged to run my business for my passion. I am glad for all these struggles that I face. Its more of a blessing really.

The best thing was I ended 2012 by going to Ustaz Kazim talk. Mum's idea which I would rather go then anywhere else on that day. So the evening was totally a night where I am awaken by a thought. It was all about how being married is great & how people like me who is still single & able should be getting married. Honestly, I never really give it a serious thought. But sitting in the talk and having the ustaz urging those who aren't married to quickly get married. Its like his words are piercing through me. I suddenly felt that my stomach was squeezed so much. So on the way back home I thought about what I've been doing and how far am I in life. Just thinking about my age & learning that I am capable of getting married. As in I am at a point in my life where marriage is the thing to come next. But I am not sure If I am ready to hold such big responsibility. Having to care for someone else's well being & besides my own. Having to support the future 'him'. I don't know if I can do it. I am afraid of what is yet to come. Am I able to do it?

Lets just hope, 2013 will show me the way. InsyaAllah...who knows I might meet someone this year? :P

Lets pray that all of us will find our special someone & be happily married soon! InsyaAllah...amin!